Im missing something real!

It's been years. I am single. The loneliest nights and days are killing me now. I was stupid. I was in love in two people at the same time. I have no choice to choose. Well i said to one of them " I am not ready yet. Maybe after graduation....i will pursue you" what the hell, i'm the guy yet im the one who refuses to say yes!ahahahha(gwapo eh no?).

Maybe now i had a karma. I think i have found the right one, i'm ready and i'm pursuing her. We met for so many instances. I have never knew someone like her before. We have lots of things in common. Before the sem ends, we already started texting and calling. Then after a week there's no communication at all.

At the day of starting of the classes in our school library. Break. Im sitting. I was wondering if she had enrolled already. I called her mobile. No answer. Cannot be reached. I called her other number. Her mother answered. Said " she's not here, she's in manila, fixing papers, maybe she'll come back here on Friday".

When i got home: I called her number. It's ringing. I was glad. She picked it up. I said
" What happened? we had no communication in the past weeks, what you' re up to?, what was your mother saying that you're fixing papers?. Are you going abroad?"
"um, no, haha"
"Um, getting married?with whom?"
"ahahahahahaha, of course not!"
"I called you earlier. You're not picking up. Why?"
"There's no signal here. Wait, i'm choppy, i'll look for a signal"
"And what's up with you?tell me what are you fixing?"
"ahahaha, i'll tell you when i come back there. If this is sure, i'll give you the details"
"OK. but enroll yourself on Friday ok?ahahahaha, I miss you i think:)"
"Ingat ka!"
"Kaw din, lalo na, nasa manila ka, nagaayos ka pa ng papers"
"OK, Bye"
"ge, ingat, ingat!:)"

It's Friday night. I missed call. She missed call. I dialed again. She answered. I said:
"Miniskol mo ko?"
"yap, you missed call me"
"Have you gone home?"
"ahahahaha, i dont think i'm coming back home"
"what?"
"ahahaha, Kidding. I'll maybe go home tommorow, i'm still not done here yet"
"Ok, You take care."
"Oh, you take care too:)"

We texted the other day. After that, no communication until this very moment that i am typing, I am still clueless on what's up with her. Were friends. She told me everything about her that she didn't told those stories to other. We planned dates, a series, after graduation. Even going to our province and she's very much excited about it.

Before the start of this post i asked here classmate:
 " where's she?"
"Um, she's not going to study anymore"
In my head I was like "what?, i ...."
"Siguro may gusto ka dun, lagi mong hinahanap eh!"
I just smiled.

I'll maybe contact her. Earlier after the class. I wondered. I Realized that love and having someone is worth having than success. Whom will i share these success?with myself?with friends?It's not enough. In life there's really a time and point that you're just simply tired of being alone. I maybe dont know that i am afraid to love again, and i just say, "after my goals in career, there's a room for someone now", but maybe the truth is i am just afraid to happen in repeat from the past.

I went to plaridel last night. When i'm on my way home. I heard the corrs' song All the love in the world. This song is me. Yes, ayokong mapasama sa SMP!Samahan ng Malalamig ang Pasko but for over years now of my existence i am always present when the rollcalls happen in the assembly of SMP!

I dont wanna call her just to say i miss her and i need her and i want her back or what the hell happened to her. I'll just study. Think of her sometime until i can find someone, besides i still dont know her much!:)










Quote: Beauty Queens are intimidating even if they have good character and adorable personally. She's a beauty queen.

stevevhan

12 comments:

  1. Time will come na darating din yung tamang babae para sayo. Kung hindi man sya, may darating pang iba.

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  2. Awwww... this inspires me to make a post about someone too. hahaha.

    maybe she's going to work in Manila, Steve. Sayang nga lang at parang naudlot ung sa inyo. baka sinadyang ganon mangyari para makapag focus ka sa studies mo muna at pag okay na... pwede na kayo. think positive.. malay mo dba? :)

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  3. Enjoy mo na lang muna ang pagiging single at binata mo...darating din yan tol, wag ka magmadali, kasi once na makapagasawa ka, lifetime na yan..mamimiss mo naman ang buhay binata...

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  4. NAks! Sige ikaw na ang lumalove life! hehehehhehe

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  5. huwaw! lumalovelife haha ! ^.^

    anyway, you seem very concern to her.
    kasi nga may gusto ka loool ^.^
    it's not being rude naman.
    though you refused the other girl it's alright.
    kesa naman be committed when you're not really ready.

    for me, that sucks even more.
    Ü

    im thinking kung ano rin yung papeles na inaayos nya. curious ba! haha :D

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  6. naintriga naman ako sa kwento nyo hihi :D aabangan ko ang susunod na kabanata

    you're still young. just enjoy life :)

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  7. nde koh marinig ung bg music... dunno why... uhm... hmm... sori nemen kc SMP ren akoh ilang years nah... why oh why??? lol... ei first wanna say thanks for visitin' mah blog... salamat sa pagkaligaw don... salamat sa komentz... nd uhm... hmmm... sau nd sa girlaloo... first yeah study muna... unahan ang study... and i believe if u guyz are meant to be together eh u guyz will be together.. hangkuletz nang advice eh noh... kinda like kahit bumaliktad ang mundo eh darating ang time na magiging kayoh...don't worry so much love... don't hurry up love... love will come findin' u... in God's right time... you don't have to go anywhere.. cuz it'll pop up right into ur face... okei lang yan... enjoy ur life... juz serve diz love as ur inspiration...but not to stress u out.. life is beautiful... nagsalita akoh eh noh... dapat sinabi koh yan saken... lol.. ingatz parekoy... Godbless!

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  8. Hmm I don't know the whole story pero mahirap talaga mamangka sa dalawang ilog nang sabay....

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  9. oo nga enjoy2 life muna kasi baka mamiss mo yan pagmarried ka na...

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  10. Ikaw talagang bata ka...huwag ka magmadali ano. You have many things to attend to. Your studies, your family, this blog...etc.

    Pero kung nakita mo na si The One, then go go go. Pero huwag padalos-dalos.

    At saka tol. Isa isa lang. If you love one person then you love another, then hindi totoong pagmamahal ang nararamdaman mo. Suriin muna ang sarili bago sumugod sa love love love.

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  11. cge lang parekoy darating din xa sayo...sa tamang panahon...

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  12. AHHAAH! The loneliness that single-ness brings to an individual. It can sometimes crack somebody's nuts!

    ReplyDelete

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